Talking to Yourself Deserves Listening As Well

Aug 3rd, 2009 | By Dr Jerry D Elrod | Category: Senior Moments Blog

Have you ever been caught talking to yourself?  It is a rather red faced experience.  It happened to me one day when putting away my lawn mower and simultaneously complaining about how poorly it had been recently repaired.  To my surprise, when I looked up, there stood the repair man, within ear shot.  There was no doubt he had heard me.  There was no doubt I was caught red faced and red handed.  There was no comfortable way to excuse what I said or to pretend the he didn’t hear me.  His face spoke volumes.

If articulating a feeling or a complaint, one needs to be attentive to one’s own words.  It is difficult enough to take back words when you are in the actual presence of another person.  It is impossible to take them back, when the only audience is you and perhaps a hidden listener.  Watching what you say, how you say it requires sensitivity as great or greater than when you are talking face to face with someone else.

Perhaps framing a thought or rehearsing an approach you might take with someone else and doing it aloud seems like a good idea.  Perhaps.  But be sure you are far distant from any one remotely related to what you are fabricating.  Indeed, go to a very private place, far removed from the intrusion of any interruption. 

More critically, listen to what you are saying.  Don’t speak, just for the sake of getting inflections correct , but to put the force of your own convictions behind your words. Perhaps the rehearsing will enable you to decide whether they need to be spoken at all.  Depending upon the agenda, whether asking for the hand of another in marriage, explaining a behavior you wish to apologize for, telling someone what you think about some issue upon which you disagree, whatever, preparation is not a bad discipline.  

Another is talking yourself out of talking to yourself.  Maybe the issue has been blown too large, way out of proportion.  Maybe a note would suffice.  Maybe just forgetting it would work.  Listening to your own internal debate, whether openly vocal or silently whispered, will enable arriving at resolution. 

I know I would have been much better off if,  on the day of the lawnmower, I had kept my mouth shut and my thoughts to myself.  I lost a friend that day, unnecessarily, and one that I am likely never to regain.  Talking to yourself deserves listening as well.



3 comments
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  1. Hmm… I read blogs on a similar topic, but i never visited your blog. I added it to favorites and i’ll be your constant reader.

  2. Thank you and come back often…

  3. Sometimes it’s really that simple, isn’t it? I feel a little stupid for not thinking of this myself/earlier, though.

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