Seniors: Learning to Love Family All Over Again

Oct 6th, 2009 | By | Category: Senior Moments Blog

Every shift and change that occurs in a person’s life brings unpredictability. Because we change not only physically, but emotionally and intellectually, we need to be aware of how those changes affect interaction among members of our own family.

It begins to become most clear when, if there are children in the family, some challenges to authority, to insight and discipline are made by the child with his/her parent.  That experience sees considerable repetition, until one day, the child usually, and sometimes the parent, recognizes there has been another change. 

At whatever period one finds these experiences occurring, there are often exclamations, angers, outbursts, regretful acts and words demonstrated.  Eventually, these may be dealt with directly, ignored or become just a part of the landscape of our lives. 

It is then that discovery of the need to reestablish loving behaviors and patterns can be undertaken. If they are not, they may fester and serve to create hurt for years to come.  Trying to resolve conflict, in any family, is far preferable to stuffing it.  Stuffing it usually leads to behaviors that are repetitious in subsequent family experiences.  The child grows up, remembers being treated or scolded or disciplined in a certain negative way and repeats the behavior.  It is more healthy to break the cycle, to make amends, to offer sincere apologies and to embrace.

Learning to love family all over again helps to create heaalthy emotional environments.  For some reason, even when buried, emotional discord and disunity has a way of rearing its ugly head.  Removing the memory through replacement of behaviors that are more healthy will help stop that awful rearing. 

There is no reason for anyone to live out their lives with rancor or even hate over something that was never adquately addressed or admitted to.  Like a bad scar that might be corrected by surgery, emotionally negative influences can be removed and  repaired. 

Love is among the qualities that most find most rewarding, enjoyable, satisfying in the giving and receiving. Learning or relearning that you can be a loving person who enjoys affection, giving and receiving, is one of the gifts of aging for yourself and others.

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