Seniors: Counting the Anniversaries

Aug 31st, 2009 | By Dr Jerry D Elrod | Category: Senior Moments Blog

Today marks our 34th anniversary.  Nothing special, not silver or gold anyway.  The closest to it is 35 which is marked by coral, and the state of coral world wide is none too good.  So I suppose we have to sandwich something in for the  occasion of a 34th anniversary.  Sandwich, that might be it.  We will go out for a sandwich.  Not a cool idea. 

The 34th is a remarkable moment, if you think about it.  If doubled it is 68, and if we are prudent in our choices and judgments, we may just make that.  But there is, you might know, nothing to mark that occasion either.  Its these odd years that seem to count for nothing in the world of marital bliss and domestic tranquility.  Maybe those of us who enjoy these silent celebrations do so reinforcing our relationships in ways that help us make it to the big ones, the ruby (40th), and the sapphire (45th) and the golden, it goes without saying.

Hitting the big time, the 75th means it is accompanied with a diamond.  If you got one at marriage, you had to wait another 75 years for another.  I suppose that is better than a gold watch at retirement.  But there are a lot of things that would seem more timely after 75 years than a diamond.  Wouldn’t you be concerned about misplacing it?

The reward of our 34 years is in the living.  It is in the rich passing of the wonderful life that has unfolded day by day before us.  It is in knowing that even with all those years having stacked up, we still love and cherish each other.  We respect what our relationship is and has become.  We treasure the memories and the gifts of experience and joy and the bearing of one another’s pain. 

We have travelled rough and often dusty roads together.  We have been through air and over waters to see this magnificent world.  We have shared in seeing our grandchildren grow and feel their affection.  We have delighted in the joys and good times we have shared with our children.  We are blessed to still enjoy the living presence of two of our biological parents.

Thirty four years may seem like a while, particularly for those whose anniversaries are still in the single digits.  Just be aware that those are less expensive years. The fifth anniversary is marked by something wooden.  You could even carve such a gift. 

Start imagining now something really special for your 18th anniversary or 27th or 41st.  Best of all make everyday a day that celebrates your being together, your having found one another, and that every year, however many it observes, is one more that  grants you the grace of a rich life.   

As for a gift, well let it be shone in the eyes and in the face.  There is where the real story is told.  Let it come through in unspoken words, in nonverbal ways that communicate how deep the love, how permanent and lasting the bond.



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