Senior Complainers Take Note: Other Than That, Mrs. Lincoln, “How did you enjoy the Play?”

Sep 16th, 2009 | By | Category: Senior Moments Blog

A litany of complaints is often received with disinterest, indifference and little sympathy.  Most of us have heard all the complaints, registered the many details for “woe is me,” and have shoveled out about as much compassion as we are prepared to, particularly for a winter cold, a nasty touch of arthritis, a stomach ailment and other “major” aging deficiencies. 

The quote in the title has long been a classic response to the complainer.  The point is there is little sympathy for the chronic complainer who can do nothing to add to the conversation other than bemoan his/her state of existence.  Good luck, pal.  It just doesn’t carry much water. If all you have to offer to the conversation is a running account of your bowels, best look elsewhere. 

Complainers, particularly among older persons (notice I didn’t say elderly), are the least heard and cared for of persons we most want to spend time with and around.   If you ain’t got more to say than “how you feel,” you might want to consider reading a joke book before going out.  If you can pull it off, the conversation might be much more scintillating. 

On a scale from 1 to 10, complainers rate about a minus 4.  If you have wondered why people don’t seek you out, quickly depart your company, or fail to invite you to their occasions, then maybe it is time to test your CQ, complaint quotient. If the best you can do is find something, somebody, some situation to complain about,then maybe you need to evaluate your worthiness to be in circles of engagement.  The question is:  Would you want to be with yourself? 

All of us have social needs.  We long for interaction with others.  We crave friendship, frivolity, fun.  Why not?  But when we block the likelihood of that happening, then we need not blame others, but look first to ourselves. There is no reason to exist within a vacuum.  It is possible to accrue the benefits of social interchange by recognizing how to be happy, engaging, appropriately flirtatious, conversational and relaxed.  You are not the center of the universe.  Your pains are irrelevant in social settings.  You are one who can spark conversation, enliven  interaction, provoke stimulation.  Your life becomes richer and the participation of those around you becomes extravagantly rewarding.

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