For Senior Women: More Thoughts About My High School Class Reunion

Jul 4th, 2010 | By Jeannine Becker | Category: For Senior Women

I was telling my daughter about my high school class reunion and her compassionate response spurred me to further thought and consideration.  She commented that high school seems to be such a difficult time for so many students.  It was true in my day, 50 years ago,  it was true in her day, 25 years ago, and I imagine it will also be true for my grandchildren today.

There were struggles with friendships, painful  competitions, and the whole business of ‘growing up’…moving from childhood, through adolescence towards adulthood….ohmeohmy, it’s no wonder that we struggle so much in those years.  One of my painful memories was that of waitinghopingwishing that I would be chosen, NOT LAST, when teams were selected to play on the playground.  Two girls were selected to captain the two teams, then those two would take turns choosing who they wanted to be on their teams.  Of course someone always was chosen last…and frequently that was the same someone over and over and over. 

My youngest sister accompanied me on this weekend and we were talking about this very thing.  She told me that she was always chosen last.   And so today I ask if there was/is any other way of selecting teams?   50 years ago all I thought was, selfishly, “I don’t want to be the last selected.”  I am wondering today if, in my grandchildren’s schools, does this situation even exist?  I will take that question to my children. 

I remember well the feeling of ‘not fitting in’ with any of the popular girls in my class.  They always seemed to have the most fun, were the loudest, made their voices heard, and seemed to be allowed to do many activities I either wasn’t allowed to, or didn’t feel comfortable doing, because I felt I didn’t fit in.  It was truly a difficult time for me. 

One of the reasons I originally decided against going to this reunion and used all my excuses to cover, were these very feelings that unsuspectingly returned to me.  It’s easy to bury feelings like these when we move away, grow up a bit or a whole lot, and life’s experiences replace the experiences of our youth.  However, one of my conscious thoughts a few weeks ago was that I had buried some negative feelings from my youth that I wanted to be released from.  I also have decided that I want to live as free from regrets as I possibly can.  That was when I began to realize that I could possibly kill two birds with one stone!  Actually I didn’t want to ‘kill one bird’ and add another bird to my regret bucket which I’m working to clean out.

All of this to say again how healing, cleansing, freeing and good it was to meet my former classmates as adults who have also matured a whole lot,  yes, even those popular girls some of whom are now popular adults.  We liked each other, accepted each other, and respected each other and we all seemed to thoroughly enjoy re-meeting and reconnecting in a whole new and pleasant way.



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