Women increasingly are enjoying worldwide travel, sometimes solo and sometimes in groups.  Some of us have no compunction about setting out by ourselves, and others of us have varying degrees of reticence.  No matter how you categorize yourself, you need to remain aware that women are often targeted for crime because we are considered easier targets than men. It’s a perception, and we need to admit it exists.

It is not necessary, however, to hide in your home and not venture out.  Women can enjoy worldwide travel, by themselves or with others, and be perfectly safe by observing a few safety tips. This article will address hotel room safety.  Others in the future will identify additional suggestions for being safe in travel.

Suggestions for Hotel-Room Safety

• Be sure to get your hotel room number in writing; if a clerk calls out your room number, insist on a change and ask her/him not to identify the number out loud.
• Request a room close to the elevator or stairway.  You are safer if you don’t have a long distance to walk to your room.  When you are returning to your room, have your door key in your hand so you can open it immediately.
• Do not accept a room on an L-shaped hallway that is located off the main hallway.  It’s too easy for someone to hide on those short non-main hallways, and you are safer in a room where more people are walking by more often.
• Carry a small rubber door-stop with you when you travel; use it to jam doors shut that do not have a security bar or device that you can use to make sure the door cannot be opened from the outside.
• If your room has a balcony or if you are on the ground/first floor, be sure your windows are locked.
• Never open your hotel door for anyone you are not expecting.  If someone at your door identifies him/herself as a hotel employee and you have not asked for assistance, call the front desk to ensure the person is legitimate before you open the door.

Above all, trust your intuition!  Women’s intuition is legendary, and we need to cultivate and trust it.  If you feel in danger, you probably are, and you need to take immediate steps to get to a place of safety.

Since the loss of my father a few short weeks ago, memories have been flooding back from my childhood.  Winter in northeast Iowa was, and still is, relentless.

We lived in an old drafty two-story home that was heated with a coal furnace.  Every fall, an old man would pull up to the side of the house, open the coal shute and shovel a load of coal into the storage room in our basement.  That was right next to the furnace so it was easy to access.

My sisters and I slept in rooms that had floor registers allowing warm air from the first story to drift up to our rooms.  But it was never very warm on the second floor when the temperature was freezing outside.  We slept in flannel pajamas with socks, covered by several thick home-made quilts and comforters.

My memory is of awakening on frosty mornings, jumping out of bed, throwing on my bathrobe and running downstairs to the big floor register in the middle of the room between the dining area and living room.  We four sat around that register, warming our little bodies before we went to the breakfast table.

What I was mostly unaware of then was what my dad had to do in order for us to be able to sit by that floor register and enjoy a warm home in the middle of winter.  When he arose every morning, he had to go down two flights of stairs, stoke the coal embers, shovel several buckets of coal into the furnace and then stir the fuel around to get it burning.  Only then did the house begin to warm up.  And he had to do that early enough so it was warm when we four awakened.  Daddy did that every winter morning for years, until we finally were able to get a gas furnace to replace the old coal one.  He never complained.  I think he just knew what he had to do to take care of his four little chicks.

Thank you, Daddy.

Red Chard Recipe

Here’s a great recipe for Red Chard.  We got a bunch this week in our organic coop delivery and I experimented with it.  To our total delight, the final dish was superb!  Here’s what I did:

Measure the amount of chard to use by picking up a big handful, put your hand around the stalks and use that much.  Cut off the red woody stalks; cut the green leafy chard into one inch strips.  Saute a couple of fresh garlic cloves in 3-4 tsps of olive oil for about a minute.  Add the chard, salt and pepper to taste, and a pinch of dried red pepper, and cook until tender but not mushy; stir as needed.  Be sure to use fresh chard!

The editor of AARP The Magazine, Nancy Perry Graham, wrote about making memories in a recent edition.  She wrote about a trip her mother, daughter and she took to New York City recently.  Her final paragraph struck a chord with me:  “The anxious and angry moments are fleeting; the mess from the play dough can be swept away. But the memories of good times together stay with us for a lifetime.”

I still feel the huge hole left in my life when my father died just two weeks ago. He was 96, so his presence in my life was forged both with many years of being together as well as a deep and abiding love that a daddy and daughter feel for each other.  I’m now forced to look for ways to make that hole go away, or at least get smaller so life doesn’t feel quite so empty.

Memories, Distant and Recent

And I’m now beginning to realize the answer is in the memories, such as Graham wrote about.  Memories of a childhood with my hard-working father who always made time to help us trim the Christmas tree, cut the pumpkins faces for our jack-0-lanterns, come to all our piano and organ recitals, attend church on Sunday mornings, teach us how to drive a car and give each of us away on our wedding day.

Our family vacations were such fun!  We went fishing in Northern Minnesota because Daddy loved to fish.  But my sisters and I loved water skiing, so the compromise was to fish every morning and water ski every afternoon.  He loved driving the boat and pulling us on skis behind him.  Mom spent half her time in the boat with him and the other half skiing with us.

He paid for college educations for all four of us, without a whimper.  He even helped with a couple of Masters degrees.  He and Mom took our Brazilian exchange-student sister into their home for almost a year, loving her and providing for her as they did for the four of us.

The most recent memories were intentionally created just three weeks before he died.  Jerry and I traveled to Arizona to spend two weeks there, creating memories that we knew would carry us beyond his earthly life.  We did not know how soon he would die.  We just knew he was failing.  So we had lunch or brunch or dinner together every day for 10 days, always with his favorite Merlot wine by his plate.  We laughed our way through those happy times, enjoying the witty things that would surface through his dementia.  And we always ended our days together with hugs and reassurances of our commonly shared love and devotion with him and our step-mom. He died 12 days after we departed.

The memories make all the difference.  The hole just got a little smaller, a little less daunting.

A friend recently took her adult daughter to Paris for  a holiday.  They took in a French culinary course and enjoyed touring the city.  She is a senior citizen, as is her husband, who–although he loves to travel–is unable to do so any longer.  So she has chosen to continue her travel passion without him.

Increasingly senior women are finding they can decide to participate in a variety of activities that do not interest their spouses; indeed, some husbands simply are physically unable to join their wives in some activities.  Historically women would choose to stay at home with their infirmed (or unwilling) husbands, to take care of them.  That was the wifely duty prescribed by society.

With the highlight on women’s rights and the freedom that came with the women’s revolution in the 60s and 70s, women discovered they could make choices beyond doing what society dictated.  The part of that that affected senior women was to become free to choose to do something other than what one’s husband chose.

Travel Options for Senior Women

One of the changes a lot of senior women experience now is the freedom to travel, with or without their spouses.  In fact, Internet websites are found that are devoted to senior women travel, including tours designed for women’s interests.  This means that women can travel with other women, new friends and old, in the safety of a group seeing sights that interest them and participating in activities designed for women to enjoy.

So if you want to travel in your senior years and your spouse/partner does not, you are free to make the choice to plan where you want to go and what you want to do. Part of that plan probably needs to include care for your spouse/partner in your absence.  If he is indeed in need of daily care, home health nursing services are likely available with an order from his primary care physician.  If he can take care of himself and just needs some companionship, you can arrange for a small group of people/neighbors/family to take turns visiting him and doing things with him to keep him company.

Free up your lives, senior women!  You deserve it!

At my 50th high school class reunion last June, a fellow-classman gave me and my sisters the penultimate compliment; he was introducing me as the featured speaker for the banquet, and he asked me what he should say about me.  I asked him what he remembered about me and my family; his response, “You and your sisters were the classiest girls in town!”

Classy, not cute.  No one ever referred to us as ‘cute’.  I must admit I have a pet-peeve about the word ‘cute’... My mother, grandmother and all my aunts made it clear, when I was a child, that ‘cute’ had negative connotations.  I was never told I was cute by any of them, because they sided with the notion that ‘cute’ bordered on the insulting, was a put-down to the extreme.

So when I hear someone refer to a senior citizen as cute, or something she has on is ‘cute’, I get nauseous.  It translates in my head, “You really look (or have some apparel you are wearing) at a minimum inappropriate or more likely, totally incapable of being well-groomed.”

The alpha-Dictionary.com reference to the word is interesting.  And you can find a gazillion references on the Internet to describe in boring detail what I am talking about.  Just search for ‘negative meaning of cute‘ and they will pop up in front of your eyes.

We need to be careful to distinguish between senior women who are cognitively impaired and are unable to identify appropriate language and behavior from those who are not impaired.  We’re talking about the latter here.

So ‘cute’ heads my list of No-Nos for senior women.  What are some others?

• Those three-inch heels that make you look so wobbly that someone is always hanging on to you to keep you steady;
• Above the knee dresses, even with leggings that cover your saggy-skin legs;
• Poorly applied rough, bright red or pink and too thick as well as spread around too far;
• Poorly applied eye liner, mascara and shadow that clumps, smears and runs down your face giving you the appearance of a clown;
• You all can add more to this list, I’m sure!

What is understandable (and forgivable) is senior women wearing white slacks and tennis shoes all year round.  The tennis shoes are more likely to keep you from falling, and the white pants just won’t wear out. We all live on fixed incomes so it’s okay that you don’t throw out clothes that can still be worn.   AARP has a list of things senior women should not wear.  Worth taking a look-see.

Inappropriate Behavior in Senior Women

There is also some generally-accepted recognition of behavior in senior women that is inappropriate… at best.

• dripping verbal ‘sugar’ around men to get their attention;
• hanging on men in social situations to get their attention;
• acting like you wish you were 21 again;
• flirting with men because you cannot figure out how to carry on a meaningful conversation;
• flaunting jewelry, particularly things that sparkle;

These lists could obviously go on for a long time.  There’s an old saying that’s been around for a long time that sums it up nicely:  “Taste is something you can buy.  Class is not.”  I must admit, I’d rather be classy than cute.

The caregiving stories, advice and tips available on the Internet help all us caregivers learn more about how to do our job better.  Most of us want to do the best job we can taking care of our elderly loved ones.  They were there for us when we were younger, and we want to be present for them when they can no longer fend for themselves.  Contributing to their quality of life is one of our major goals when we spend time with them.

But the demands on our time and energy can take a toll on our quality of life.  If we aren’t careful we can lose contact with friends, feel emotionally depleted and lose physical energy just taking care of an elder.  Six years ago, I realized my mother-in-law was no longer able to take care of herself.  She wasn’t bathing, was eating only cereal out of a box and an occasional bowl of oatmeal, and wasn’t spending any time with friends.  We took her to visit an assisted living facility, and she ultimately decided she wanted to move there.

Fast forward six years.  She is now in a nursing home, living with Alzheimer’s and falling a lot because she refuses to (cannot?) ask for help.  Our caregiving is limited to taking phone calls when there is a problem and visiting her at least twice a week.  The nursing home has highly skilled personnel and we are confident in the quality of her care. But the emotional strain of concern for her well-being never goes away. I cannot imagine what life would be like if she were our full-time responsibility.  And I know thousands of women (and men!) live with that responsibility every day.

Christmas Wish List

We recently found an AARP article that described a Caregiver’s Christmas Wish List.  It’s very good, and we recommend it to our readers.  Within the article is a list of intangible things friends can do to help caregivers.  We reprint it here, with grateful thanks to Amy Goyer writing for AARP:

• “I’ll research that new medication your mother is on and get back to you today.”
• “I’ll go and see your parents for an hour or two while you go do something fun or get your work done.” (respite!)
• “I’ll sort that huge stack of mail for you.”
• “I’ll water your plants at home twice a week for you so it’s one less thing for you to worry about.”
• “I’m going to the store – is there anything I can pick up for you or your parents?”
• “I’ll go with you next time you take your Mom and Dad to a fun outing – let’s set the date now.”
• “I’ll look over your parents’ new health insurance info and give you a summary.”
• “I’ll come over and help you put up your Christmas decorations – it will take half the time and we’ll have fun doing it. Then you can get back to your duties with your parents.”

So the next time you see a friend who spends most of her/his time caregiving for an elderly loved one, take a minute to offer to help in a way that the friend will appreciate.

Superfoods are those foods found in nature with high antioxidant levels, calorie sparse and nutrition dense.  Learning to use them in meals as well as baked items helps senior citizens add them to their daily food intake.

So what are examples of some superfoods?  Most experts on the Internet agree on the following:

• avacados
• beets
• berries (raspberries, blueberries, strawberries, blackberries)
• cabbage
• fish
• lentils
• nuts
• quinoa
• spinach
• tomatoes

Categories of Superfoods

Categories of superfoods generally include greens, fruits and nuts, bees, seaweeds and herbs.  Foodmatters.tv says this about superfoods:

“Superfoods are a special category of foods found in nature. By definition they are calorie sparse and nutrient dense meaning they pack a lot of punch for their weight as far as goodness goes. They are superior sources of anti-oxidants and essential nutrients – nutrients we need but cannot make ourselves. We all may be adding more salads and vegetables to our diets, but concern over the quality of foods grown on mineral depleted soils makes Superfoods an intelligent choice.” (foodmatters.tv)

So, Seniors, do a search of ‘superfoods’ on your favorite browser, find the gazillion recipes out there and start using them for delicious dishes that have a positive impact on senior health.

The incidence of breast cancer continues to be a major health concern for women of all ages, and particularly senior women.  We are concerned not only for ourselves, but for our daughters and grand-daughters.  And although men are not immune to breast cancer, their risk is considerably less than it is for women.

The major risk factor continues to be a history of breast cancer in one’s immediate family… mother, aunt, grand-mother, sister.  However a study conducted a number of years ago raises some interesting questions.  A California Breast Cancer Research Program study revealed 36% of breast cancers in California women were found in the upper-outer quadrant of the breast. A picture of the location/area can be seen on this page.  What did not seem to matter was the age of the victim, her ethnic background or where she lived.  The location of the cancer was considerably higher in the upper-outer area of the breast.

Re-Evaluate Deodorant Choices

Some women and their primary-care physicians find this beyond coincidence. A Naturopathic Physician in our family shared this information with her female relatives, suggesting we might want to re-evaluate the deodorant we use.  She reported that she believes there could be some relationship between antiperspirant deodorant containing aluminum and other chemicals that clog up the underarm pores to prevent body odor, and breast cancer. The underarm area is very close to the breast tissue that has such a high incidence of cancer… incidence that is beyond coincidental for many of us at risk.

There aren’t any studies that we know of that show such a relationship.  However, whether it is clogged up pores that do not allow normal release of body waste through perspiration, or toxic chemicals in antiperspirant deodorants that are absorbed into the body, the results of the CBCRP study are too significant to ignore.

The ND in our family recommends that we women use a non-toxic deodorant, free of chemicals that cause pores to close up on purpose.  Most women in our family have made the change.  And yes, we experience body odor more often than we would like.  We shower or wipe down our underarms daily.  It’s a little bit of a nuisance.

But we believe we are minimizing our chances of breast cancer. Our great-grandmother died of breast cancer.  Two of our cousins have already had breast cancer.  We’re just trying to maximize our chances of not getting it.

Most of us senior women grew up in homes where our mothers and grandmothers canned fruits and vegetables in the autumn, with produce grown in family gardens during the summer.  Canning was a necessity, because we didn’t have supermarkets with shelves and shelves of canned goods. We had small grocery stores that carried the bare minimum.  Our mothers had to can food to be able to feed their families during the winter.

The function of canning has changed. Some of us do it because we enjoy knowing what goes into the food we eat.  Others of us just plain enjoy canning; we feel productive – like we’ve made a contribution to the ongoing health of our loved ones.  Others of us do it as our mothers did, out of necessity.

Home canning is making a comeback. Since the start of the recession, home canning supplies sales are up, some estimate as much as 35 per cent.  Homemakers (women and men) are beginning to can produce again because it’s cheaper than buying canned fruits and vegetables from a supermarket shelf.

Substitutes for Sugar and Salt

Many new recipes found online now have suggestions for sugar and salt substitutes in canning produce. Unsweetened apple or white-grape juice is a favorite to replace sugar.  Salt is simply omitted whenever possible.  Modified pectins help jelly ‘gel’.  Many Internet sites recommend canning only a small amount of each fruit/vegetable.  You don’t want jars left over next year when you start harvesting your garden, or when your food coop begins to include fresh local produce.

Here is an example of a website that is all about canning.  As always, the best way for you to find exactly what you are looking for is to enter the search terms in your favorite search engine box.  ‘Recipes for canning’ is a good place to begin.

Whatever your motivation, you might want to give canning a try.  This SCJ editor finds the return to basics in the kitchen very gratifying.

I was talking with a friend recently about gout.  She was hospitalized for the health problem in both feet, and had to take antibiotics because her feet and ankles swelled so much that her skin developed lesions.  The treatment for gout left her with considerable less muscle strength than she previously had, and she is now walking with a cane and her mobility is impaired.  Not a good trade-off, you say?

Naomi Schlesinger M.D. is an expert on gout; she is Chief of the Division of Rheumatology at Robert Wood Johnson Medical School in New Brunswick, NJ.  She agrees that the cause of gout is high uric acid in the blood.  The kidneys aren’t working well enough to get rid of it, so it (in a nutshell) creates gout.  Experts have said for years that diet alone cannot ‘cure’ gout, but poor diet probably can trigger a gout attack.  So is there anything out there that can ‘help’ (not cure) reduce gout attacks?

Dr Schlesinger conducted a study with other researchers that revealed seniors who drank a tablespoon of tart (bright red) cherry juice concentrate twice a day for four months reduced the number of gout attacks by half.  In addition, a third of the participants in the study were gout-free.  That’s pretty amazing!

Effects of Tart Cherry Juice

We’ve known for years that tart cherry juice (not the sweet stuff that comes from black cherries and bing cherries) is high in antioxidants. Runners drink tart, bright-red cherry juice to reduce muscle soreness.  It has natural anti-inflammatory action, so it makes sense that it could help reduce (not cure!) arthritic gout.

So what kind of cherries are we talking about?  They are bright red and are sometimes described as ‘sour’.  The ones found most commonly on the Internet are Montmorency cherries.  They can be purchased as concentrated juice, in tablets or dried fruit. Do a search for ‘bright red tart cherries’ in your favorite search engine, and you will find a gazillion pages.  As always, be sure to talk with your primary care physician before making any changes in your diet if you have gout.